Thursday, May 26, 2016

Networks of support

I still feel like I kind of have to live a double life with mental health issues.  It's not as if I need to unload every single traumatic event that has ever occurred in my life publicly, but it is important to feel connected to those who perhaps know the depths of depression or the frightening heights of mania.  It's important to know others have walked down similar roads, where they'd have to step away from life and navigate the halls of a psych ward for a few weeks until reckless thoughts are replaced with functioning, stable mental processes.

As far as relationships go, I often think about ways to suggest to loved ones how they might go about offering support to someone in the midst of a mental health crisis.  I've thought a lot about it in fact, and here are a few things:

1) Visit your friend or loved one during visiting hours in the psych ward, don't just gossip about them with your friends and family in their absence. Just go and play a game of scrabble with them, or bring them a nice personal care item like a lavender hand cream that uplifts their spirit.  BE THERE.  I know it's hard to see someone there, but just go and visit.

2) When visiting, don't diss the doctors or offer your opinions about every tiny facet of the mental health system.  Creating a feeling of dissatisfaction or even feeding fear for your friend or loved one just makes them feel hopeless and confused and scared.  Support.  Just offer support.  Sometimes the psych ward is the best place for them....

3) Let the professionals do their job, and give your friend or loved one space to sort through their own feelings.  There will be plenty of time down the road to advocate and help them discover helpful tools to cope, as well as make medication adjustments as needed.

These are just a few things that I wish I would have had.  Don't say things like, "you're on your own with that shit."

For the love of God, don't say that.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

At the minute, I feel that the best support network I have is the internet. Though I live in a place for those with mental health issues, I don't reveal too much to my nearest and dearest; whenever I do, I get into serious trouble.

Hats off to those who deal with such high pressure work.