Academia

I got a letter in the mail stating my student loan is PAID OFF.  Yooooowwww!  I think I'll frame it.

I cannot lie, I really struggled in school. I was dedicated to my French courses and really tried my hardest is Scientific Reasoning, twice!  I had a terrible time with Finite Mathematics and philosophical logic problems.  Languages were my thing.  Had I had the psychiatric medications in college perhaps I would have been able to cope better.  And I would have done even better had i met with a regular therapist to learn ways to handle a full-time management job while juggling courses.  I started to panic about accruing debt and eventually walked away from academia with an Associates Degree to join the work force full time.  Plus I didn't know what I wanted to do.  All I knew is I wanted to speak French well enough to get myself over to France.

And by golly I did just that.

After some soul searching, I reached out to an old professor about returning to school.  I asked him for advice and he told me honestly and bravely that academia isn't all that it's cracked up to be.  I don't know if I entirely agree with that, but I do know how uh, snobby or self-righteous certain highly-educated people can act.

I have learned a lot in life, often in a pragmatic fashion.  Experience can be just as an effective learning method as textbook knowledge sometimes.  Knowledge is power and obviously learning from the masters is essential.  But I do feel strong evidence of what unique experiences have taught me about sociology, the arts, and especially the ethics of psychology and psychiatry.

I'm still learning, and I will never stop wanting to learn more.  I may not have dedicated my life to university academics, but I'd be open to take a few courses here or there and incorporate life lessons with new studies.  I can't afford to not work full time to dedicate my time to a full-fledged return, but if I could manage it somehow, I would.  

If I don't get there, I've learned how to see the positives in any situation.  I appreciate my current position and the space I've been given to create a unique experience to share with others.  It's a lesson in building something good, becoming anchored with community, and while I may have to deal with an occasional judgmental personality (which is HER or HIS problem not mine), a majority of the people are kind, friendly and really lovely to speak with regularly.  I'm grateful for those people.