In acute states of mania, however, certain kinds of music can be a hinderance. The lyrics get to be TOO much, and for those of us who have experienced auditory hallucinations, music can actually create a kind of panic. I've been there, and I have to shut it all off. I have to shut off TVs as well, and go to my own personal peace and quiet. The world of broadcast gets too loud. I usually turn to jazz. Miles Davis and John Coltrane. It's hard to explain, but if memory serves me well enough today, other patients had some similar experiences and I know I'm not alone on this.
Still, certain songs provide such incredible solace, and I'm grateful for those who create them. There's a healing art inside some of those songs. And then there are certain songs that seem to chime in at just the right times. They may have been written by the artist from one perspective, then they reach the ears of another in different circumstances. One such universal song for me is Modest Mouse's Missed the Boat. It popped on the radio as my husband was driving me home from the hospital with my white box from the March of Dimes on my lap. The box contained all the keepsakes of the baby I had just delivered who didn't survive this world. For some reason it was just the perfect song at the perfect time. When music reaches a certain universality, it's a really special thing.
I am grateful for the music. When it gets to be too much, I shut it off. But when it helps, it works wonders.
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